The EPIC Creative Blog

Hiring
is Like Internet Dating

Written by Fuzz Martin, 4 weeks ago, 0 Comments

While I love the growth that EPIC Creative® has been experiencing, hiring is by far my least favorite activity. It’s like dating. Not fun, damn-the-inhibitions dating, either. It’s like internet dating when your biological clock is ticking and your sole intention is to get married and have babies as fast as you can. Eek! Sure, it’s exhilarating when you think you’ve found the right person, but it seems sometimes more research goes into purchasing a $10,000 piece of capital equipment than is spent researching an individual who will come into the organization, affect the culture and be paid well more than that for his/her efforts.

This process starts the same way as internet dating. You create your online profile, fill it with your ideals, tell people what you’re looking for, and put your best face forward. Then you wait for the messages to pour in.

Once they do, you generally get a mix of these people:

The “Desperate” One

This is the one who looks down the list of opportunities and applies for everything. After all, thanks to the law of probabilities.

The “I Didn’t Really Read Your Profile” One

 

The “Don’t I Know You” One

Person you’ve worked with before, have been acquainted with, (dated)

The “New At This” One

Though you may be looking for someone that’s been doing this for 4-5 years, you inevitably get an influx of, “I’m just out of school! Please hire me!” people. It’s kind of like when you say you’re looking for a  30-35 years old, but you get a

The “Perfect” Candidate

Now, don’t take this the wrong way – I’ve been on the other side of this process, and I know it’s just as stressful: Is this place full of freakshows? Am I going to hate my life every day of the week? Will I be fulfilled? Is there a future, here?

Unfortunately, unless you’re growing by only one person a year,  you have zero turnover and you have networked with the perfect candidate for your new position prior to it being opened, this is just the way it is.

 

About Fuzz Martin

EPIC Creative's Director of PR and Social Media.